Monday, July 2, 2007

A Modest Proposal

I've decided to push for year-round school. Don't get me wrong , I love summer. Nothing makes me happier than long hot days, and I hate the cold so much that living anyplace that it snows is strictly out of the question. What I can't stand are the kids who are demanding to be entertained largely due to my screen-ban between the hours of 9am and 5pm. The bickering and baiting that results from said children is enough to drive anyone crazy.

The days of needing the kids home in summer to tend the crops and water the cows are long gone. There is no earthly reason why there should be no school for 78 days in June, July and August. Their brains turn to mush, they pick on each other incessantly and they are getting on my very last nerve. Don't even get me started on the costs for day-camp or babysitting if you should actually happen to hold a job that won't allow you to take an entire three months off.

I propose that year-round school be instituted on a Federal level. Every June, we would get three weeks off. This is ample time for vacations, camp, and grandparent visiting, yet not quite enough time to drive each other insane. We would then get another three weeks off in or around October and again in February or March. The timing for these vacations would vary by district so that the entire free world wasn't trying to go skiing or to Hawaii at the exact same time. This would also result in less absences during the school year as fewer people would get the Tahoe-flu in March if there were a longer scheduled vacation that was staggered from everyone else's (achoo).

Anyone with me? I've run into a few naysayers who actually looked me straight in the eye and said that they cherished every moment of togetherness and wouldn't give up their summers for anything. I noticed that these individuals also had unusually large pupils and a barely detectable tic in the right eyelid.

I love summer. I would just love it more if the kids were in school part of the time.

On this date: In 1937, Amelia Earhart disappeared over the Pacific.


That's one clever little Yvonne said...

Amen sister :)-

Linda D. (sbk) said...

LOL. So it seems you're coping well this summer...

There are a few schools in our area that do this and the parents seem to like it.

Me? I prefer the sound of whining, fighting, screaming and general childish behaviour for the two long summer months. And the phone needs to be ringing non stop. And the cat needs to sneak out at least 4 times a day (she's supposed to be an indoor cat). And Hurricane Kelly needs to make a run through the house on the hour every hour, leaving a trail of markers with no lids, play food, teeny lego pieces and dressup clothes.

Ah, summer. I love it!!