Know the Rules Before You Break Them

I'm involved in a great mentorship project right now as part of a Yahoo Group. In reading the messages between the mentees and the mentors I've seen a pattern begin to develop. I'm not sure if it's because we're writing YA, but a lot of us don't want to follow the rules. Maybe we're all 16 emotionally, and as my good friend Phillip was fond of saying in first grade - we don't need no stinkin' rules. Rules are for the lesser writer. Rules are for the people who have no imagination.

Rules are for the people who want to be published.

If you're writing for yourself and your friends, then never mind this post. Go crazy. Pull together a 500k word young adult contemporary with a talking dog as a main character.

There are some rules that unfortunately, new writers need to be aware of (and actually follow) if they are writing in the hopes of seeing the words on their laptop become a book someday. I'm going to gear this toward getting an agent because I firmly believe that you need to get an agent in order to write anything longer than picture books. Yeah, another stinkin' rule.

Some of my favorite rules include:

YA = Younger than 18. I hate to say this, but if you're writing about college students, you probably won't be able to sell it as YA. Yes, college is much easier to write - no pesky parents to worry about. But agents probably won't look at it. If you do manage to snag an agent with this manuscript, they're probably going to tell you to rewrite it as high school students before they'll send it out. Yes, I know that ALONG FOR THE RIDE by Sarah Dessen (one of my favorites) is set in the summer between high school and college. She's Sarah Dessen. You're not.

Keep it under 100k. We've all see the doorstops that pass as novels these days - 300 to 500 word (mostly paranormal) books that look like serious reading. Anything over 100k words is going to be a red flag for an agent. Save the big stuff for your second (or third) book.

Know your genre. Contemporary isn't fantasy isn't dystopian. Each genre is a separate being with it's own rules and regs. Study up and know what you're writing before you start submitting. If you're not sure, I suggest a few days spent perusing the posts over on the message boards at Verla Kay. A confused agent isn't likely to read very far.

Get a hook. Your gentle coming-of-age story about a girl who comes to terms with her parents divorce might be really well written, but you probably won't get an agent to read it. It's been done. Find something about your story that is amazing and original and will get the agent excited to read on. A rockus coming of age story about a girl who reacts to her parent's divorce by hooking up with a hot guy who turns out to be an alien sent to bring her back to the mothership? Much more likely to get pages requested. Oh, and make sure the hook comes early in the book. Like the first page.

No more backstory. The great thing about middle grade and young adult books is that they don't fool around. We don't want to see two pages on how the light is falling in the room as the sun sets over the dunes. We don't care. Get to the juicy stuff and make it quick. You might also want to rethink that prologue. Go ahead and write it if you must. Then delete it.

Get rid of the cliches. Does your book start with a dream? With a character looking in the mirror? Does she have a dangerous but attractive lab partner? Are one or more of the parents dead (okay, guilty as charged)? You need to brush up on your cliches because agents have seen them all. There are tons of great blog posts out there about the dreaded YA cliches - one of my favorites is by my pal Joelle Anthony (whose Restoring Harmony is a rockin' book).

The rules are a pain, but worth following, at least for your first book. I know of what I speak. Just ask me about the contemporary/romance/thriller set during freshman year of college I wrote. It's awesome. And unsold.

Agents get hundreds if not thousands of query and sample pages every month - don't give them a reason to reject you off the bat.

On this date: In 1990, Henry and June is the first NC-17 rated film.

Hoarding Updates

If you're interested in the subject of hoarding, I'm putting updated links on the DIRTY LITTLE SECRETS Facebook fan page. We're putting up interesting articles on hoarding, research results, new hoarding books, etc. Feel free to post your own information relating to compulsive hoarding.

The LitChicks: LEGALLY BLONDE

As I suspected, in school and after school activities have been eating up the girl's time, so they've decided to break it up and each recommend one book per week. We're always glad to have them give good book recommendations whenever they can.

Liesl’s Choice This Week:

LEGALLY BLONDE by Amanda Brown

I got this book in a book exchange in 5th grade and didn't open it until this past summer. I recently went through a phase where I wanted to be a personal defense attorney and go to Yale Law school. I had this whole plan - I was going to graduate and start my own firm and eventually get married and then I would be this lawyer woman who was really successful and had an amazing family...it wasn't a very practical plan.

I now have a new career path but that is beside the point. This book is about a girl names Elle Woods who is Delta Gamma sorority president and goes to USC. She has a very "hot" boyfriend and 2 very good friends and a very wealthy family and she seems to have it all but...Warner (her amazing bf) breaks up with her just when she is expecting a proposal. She is devastated and mortified and sooooo sad so she devises a plan.

One of the reasons her boyfriend broke up with her was that he wanted to pursue an career in law and need to focus and become serious about school and because he was going to transfer to Stanford Law. Elle applies to Stanford Law even though her family and friends think she is crazy and out of her mind, and gets excepted. She packs her bags and heads to Stanford to win back Warner and (I think) to prove everyone wrong - that she can go to law school. She soon realizes though, that law school is no joke and she struggles to fit in. Her fellow classmates all call her Barbie and don't think she belongs there. She struggles to make friends. Warner is surprised when he runs into her and they hang out and she does all the crazy things to try to get him back and they kiss once or twice. She gains hope, she loses hope, she wants to give up, she presses on.

I can't give away the end but I tell you, Elle woods is a fighter! She is the kinda girl that stops at nothing to achieve her dreams. Look to her for inspiration! ( side note...I heard that the movie is really good too! I have yet to watch it so read and then watch!! )

On this date: In 1955, James Dean died.

The LitChicks - IMMORTAL BELOVED

Yes, it must be Thursday! Unfortunately, freshman year of high school is catching up with Liesl, but Portia was able to give us a wonderful book pick this week.

Portia’s Recommendation this Week:

IMMORTAL BELOVED by Cate Tiernan



I'm not sure if I'm allowed to review ARCs, but I'm going to take a chance here and try. Immortal Beloved was one of the books Cynthia gave us to try in the numerous stacks that made their way home with us. The blurb on the back really sucked me in, you know? Who wouldn't want to read about an immortal spoiled party girl who feels guilty and goes good? Anyone really. :)

Immortal Beloved is about an immortal girl, Nastasya (Nasty to her friends) who's on the fast track to a life with no meaning. More accurately - she's been on that path for over a century, is nowhere near getting off it, and her life has no meaning. She and her group of friends, drink, party, steal, shop, travel on a whim, rent crazy expensive apartments, and do whatever they fancy doing be it racing normal teenagers down a mountain, going to 10 different clubs in one night, jetting off on a moment’s notice to China or India or the US.......basically anything that doesn't require responsibility.

When Nastasya watches her friend break the spine of an innocent (but annoyed) cab driver with black magic, she feel so sick about not knowing her friends as well as she thought, and walking away from that cabbie to go party some more when she knows he will be paralyzed for life or maybe even die. Convinced that she's not normal, that something must change, she runs away without notice and seeks refuge at River's Edge-- the house of a woman in nowhere, Massachusetts who she met in France a hundred or so years back.

While at River's, without her friend’s influence surrounding her, Nastasya can try to reinvent herself and heal from the memories of horrible past, while embracing the magic within her. She must deal with jealous roommates, a Viking god, teachers that may be a bit too understanding, a boring job working with a girl scared senseless by her dad, boring clothes, early morning chores, crazy spring cleaning, and the thought of her friend somewhere, trying to hunt her down.....

Through it all, Nastasya continues to be at peace with herself, what happened to her family as a child, the life she's led for the last century, and what she wants from herself and from her experience at River's.

This book was really really really good! I know that sometimes books about immortals can be a bit....all the same. But I found that Cate's idea was something totally new! I liked that the girl got to be immortal for once. I liked that she didn't have to drink blood or anything to stay that way. I liked that she included personal growth for Nastasya in the book. That Nastasya could grow over the course of the book, and that all her life experiences came into play. I liked that she would bring in flashbacks of Nasty's past. It was amazing to see back that far to a place in Nasty's mind and hear what happened from a first-person witness--almost like you were there yourself. I think it was beautifully written and I encourage everyone to read Immortal Beloved - it came out just a couple of weeks ago!


On this date: In 1972, Mac Davis hit number one with the single "Baby Don't Get Hooked on Me". (Earworm anyone?)

Race to Nowhere

Last night, I sat in an old revival theater and watched the amazing documentary Race to Nowhere. From their press release:

Our high-pressure, high-stakes culture has invaded our schools and children’s lives, creating unhealthy, disengaged, unprepared and stressed-out youth. Educators, parents, and students are embracing Race to Nowhere, a new documentary film that exposes the insidious silent epidemic in our education system. The film tells the stories of young people pushed to the brink, burned-out educators, and deeply frustrated parents.

The place was packed (not least because parts of it were filmed at our elementary school - some of the people involved in the film are alums) and it was great to see so many people interested in hearing another point of view about our educational system.

I have two school-age boys and we've already seen some of the stress-related symptoms in both of them. They are both awesome students and play instruments. Right now, they are both playing rec soccer (we bowed out of the Division 1 team because I'm not completely insane), one has travel baseball and then there are the guitar lessons. We do not have one free weekday evening, and several days a week there is more than one activity. Right now, one son is up late trying to cram in the required saxophone practice before bed because he just got home from soccer. They are overscheduled. I know that. All of it will end on November 13th (not that I'm counting) and then we will revisit the things they REALLY want to do. When your kid pleads not to go to batting practice on Sunday because he really needs a day off, it is a wakeup call.

Which is why this film is so timely. I can't recommend it highly enough. Even if you totally subscribe to the type A, AP Classes, sports, music and volunteer-work way of life for your high school student, it is worth checking out. The list of upcoming showings is available here.

After I got home, I had an impromptu talk with my oldest son about what defines success. When I asked him that, his answer was "Stanford". I asked him why, and interestingly, he didn't have a ready answer except that it is the 'best' school. "What if the best school for you is a small, private college in Wisconsin?" I asked. "Or somewhere that you can study music?" Not that I'm knocking four-year colleges - on the contrary, but maybe not for the reason that everyone thinks. I honestly don't think it matters all that much where you go to get your basic degree.

What matters to me is that the school have a strong dorm community so that there is an easy and logical transition from my house to the big wide world. Living in the freshman dorms, you have a roof over your head, your bills are paid and you have access to food (boy do you - freshman 15 anyone?), but there is nobody looking over your shoulder telling you what to do. My boys need this transition because except for summer vacations, I don't want them living in my house once they turn 18.

I went to UC Santa Barbara. I can't lie, it was great. There was a lot of work, but we had a lot of fun and somehow I managed to graduate in five years after an amazing year spent abroad (that is another post altogether). Could I write without a college education? Sure. I don't need my college education to do what I do now. Guess how many creative writing classes I've taken in my life? My son guessed 'like a hundred'. The answer is one. Freshman year. The guy teaching it said I basically had no talent and I managed to scrape by with a B. I never took another one.

Yes, my college degree gave me options. Did it need to be from Stanford in order for me to be 'successful'? Obviously not. It took me a long time to find the one thing that I love to do and apparently don't completely stink at (yes, with my college degree I also recognize bad grammar when I see it). But there are other options. It's heartbreaking to see kids actually take their own lives because they feel that they have none.

On this date: In 1985, George Clooney made his debut on The Facts of Life.

Dueling Blogposts

OMG, so funny! Thanks to my writer bud/emotional yardstick Daisy Whitney for this.



First, we have a blog post by Douglas Martin on 20 reasons to date a writer. All of them adorable and almost none of them true, at least in my life.

Then the insanely hilarious blog-answer from agrammer. My favorite answer is number 2:
Writers will romance you with words. We probably won’t. We write for ourselves or for money and by the time we’re done we’re sick of it. If we have to write you something there’s a good chance it’ll take us two days and we’ll be really snippy and grumpy about the process.

Haha! Just because we can, doesn't mean we will. Reminds me of one summer when I was home from college and cleaning houses for a living. Mom (an ER nurse) asked me once why I didn't just tackle our kitchen in my spare time and my answer to her was something along the lines of I didn't ask her to stitch me up in her spare time so don't ask me to clean anything in mine.

On this date: In 1975, the Bay City Rollers make their US debut.

What was that? Did I just do an entire blog post by cross posting other people's blogs? Why, yes. Yes I did. It's a busy week.

The LitChicks - CATCHING FIRE and PRINCESS DIARIES

The LitChicks have once again taken time out of their demanding schedules to give us some recommendations this week:


Portia's Pick this week:

CATCHING FIRE by Suzanne Collins

I believe I did a review on THE HUNGER GAMES by Suzanne Collins the other week. No, I don't believe. I know I did. So you all probably read it by now! Which means I can review the amazing book number 2! In this amazing trilogy! I know I read a wide variety of genres, but I don't read a whole lot of rough and tough survival in the wild books, but this is a series that sucks you in so fast, you don't know what hit you!

The whole summer after Cynthia lent me THE HUNGER GAMES, I was begging for the 2^nd book. She said that someone (unnamed for their own sake) was in possession of it and they should be done soon. And they would return it and I could read it. It was a bit unfair-looking back- to give me the first one without the second one because I would have had to wait and wait and wait after that start and that's just not right! The suspense can't do good things for my blood pressure. (That's the argument I give my teachers about too much homework in case you're wondering and it has yet to work.) But at least I read them pretty close to the release date. :) After many careful and lengthy negotiations with the person who previously borrowed this book from Cynthia (without my permission I might add), I was given CATCHING FIRE and thought that with all my school work, I wouldn't need MOCKINGJAY for a while, so I lent it to this person who needed it. Alas, I finished CATCHING FIRE two or so days later on a Friday(!!) and needed MOCKINGJAY immediately! But this person still had it. Thankfully, they thoughtfully gave it to me unasked on Monday. :)

CATCHING FIRE was just as good as the first! The whole storyline had an amazing twist of a Quarter Quell games that calls for Katniss and Peeta to reenter the arena with other hunger games victors in a fight to the death. They must deal with new allies, new plots, new threats, new twists, new information, new attention to Katniss from an old friend, and a game bigger than Katniss or Peeta suspected.

I was surprised that Suzanne Collins could tie in another hunger games with Katniss and Peeta and still have it work without seeming like she ran out of ideas. I liked that she threw new twists in to mix things up. New lies for the Capitol and new discoveries about the bigger picture. I liked that she tied in old information from the other book that you were confused about or thought was pointless, and she built upon information and characters that you thought were unimportant. I liked that she didn't fudge everything for the good guys and make everything go right for them. She put in betrayals and deaths and you never knew who to trust, who was lying, who was sane, who had was skill, who knew what about who, who wasn't who they seemed, or who loves who and meant what they said. She was able to link stories, pasts, characters, and motives for actions without seeming too random and complicated or over thought.

This is a great book and a great series! I was reading MOCKINGJAY the past 2 days, and I literally walked to school while holding 2 textbooks and reading it. I was almost late for PE because I was reading in the locker room this morning! Because you never know what could happen to anyone, you have to read to find out what happens next!

Leisl Likes:

THE PRINCESS DIARIES by Meg Cabot

I loved these movies and so, on a trip to the store I was browsing through the book section and found this book! I was in desperate need of something to read and had started the book but never finished it so...

This book is about a girl named Amelia (who goes by Mia) whose mom is going out with her math teacher and is in love with Josh the most popular senior guy in school. She is kind of known as a freak by the popular people and isn't totally happy with her life. Well, one day her dad comes to visit and tells her that she is the heir to the throne of Genovia. She is a Princess and she isn't happy. Her grandmother comes to visit also and gives her princess lessons. In her lessons she wants Mia to become used to the paparazzi so she leaks to the news that Mia is a princess and the secret is out. She eventually accepts that she’s a princess.

Now I was surprised by how similar the book and the movie were. There were a few differences, such as the book takes place in New York and the movie takes place in San Francisco. In the movie, Mia is brunette and in the book Mia is blonde. In the movie Lily and Mia are friends the whole time and the one fight they do have they fix right away, in the book lily and Mia get in a fight because Mia has to go to princess lessons and can't help Lily with her T.V show "Lily tells it like it is". Lily stays mad at her practically the whole book. Another big difference is that Mia's Dad is alive in the book and in the movie he’s dead.

Some things that are the same are the characters. One of our family’s favorite characters is Paolo the hairstylist. He has some awesome lines in the movie. This is a quote from Princess Diaries 2 the best that I can remember. Mia: "I look like a moose!" Paolo: "Yes, but a very cute moose! You make all the boy mooses go mmmmwwwwwaaaaa!" (think moose sounds) anyway... it is definitely a good book and the movies are equally good so go read!!


On this date: In 1620, the Mayflower departs England.